Blueberries are best because I never never never want to eff around with a stinking melon & its juice running all over the counter. Blech.
That honey totally looks like jizz, doesn't it? Whatever. At least it's not a photo of some half-eaten plate, like some slurped-over bus tub. You all know who you are, cut it out.
Just peel a cucumber, cut it girthwise so it is easier to deal with. Then open it up, have your kid scoop out the seeds, section it as if a pickle spear, and dice. Until the pieces are about the size of a blueberry. Don't overthink this, as I tend to do. Just hack it up so it all fits in one's mouth without being all lumpy and outsized.
Dump a washed pint of blueberries into a bowl, add the cucumber, and toss. Take an ounce or two of feta & crumple it up a little. I crumpled it up a lot, with a fork, because I wanted the cheese to cling to the fruit, not to be in big mezze-plate hunks all over the place. God. But I felt like it spread over the salinity, so if you make the cheese miniscule, sprinkle over a 1/2tsp of salt. Don't use fancy rock salt, no one wants to crunch down on that in a fruit salad.
Drizzle over some honey, if you want. Also, chiffonade some basil if you have it. In case you don't know: chiffonade will make the basil turn brown/black on the edges, so if you have time to overthink this all, you can tear the basil, and toss it with the salad, maybe even removing it after it gets its terpenes all over. Terpenes, right? God.
I've been walking around practically naked for two weeks now, right? So I feel like I've lost about 20 IQ points. Just wearin' a variation on columns of viscose jersey every day, strapless, backless, braless. Sorry. Have a great holiday here in the U.S., don't blow yr arm off. Otherwise, how would you catch at my panty-toss, right? It's like a bouquet, but for the guys. OMG, shut up, Elle, good night. xoxoxoxox


This whole post is hilarious. Terpenes! As if!!! Making up words!
It's the heat.
I too have been basically naked forever. Naked is the future, I'm afraid.
Posted by: becky | 08 July 2012 at 11:19 PM
Terpenes is a word! It has to do with volatile oils, I think, but I am not sure it is the right one for what I was saying. I USED TO GO OUT WITH A BIOCHEMIST, TOO BAD HE DIDN'T HELP ME OUT IN THIS AREA, HERE, WHERE PEOPLE CAN TYPE THINGS.
And sweaty, too. Sweaty! Thank God I got things kicked off in DC, so everywhere since has seemed cool by comparison.
Posted by: lala | 10 July 2012 at 11:10 PM
The flavor components in basil are phenylpropanoids. Doesn't really roll off the tongue, unlike terpenes. They're chemically rather similar, but they're produced via a different synthetic pathway in plants (through the amino acid phenylalanine, rather than isoprenyl pyrophosphate, if you want to get deep into the weeds).
ANYHOW! ALL CAPS! THIS HAS BEEN ANOTHER EPISODE OF ASK A BIOCHEMIST!
Posted by: Algren | 11 July 2012 at 09:40 AM
Good grief, this has been informative! Let's tune in next time when the biochemist explains why some people hate cilantro so much!
Posted by: Becky | 11 July 2012 at 04:08 PM
Ok, totally! I'll summon him in all-caps the next time I do a food thingy where highlighting the cilantro is relevant. Until then, xo
Posted by: lala | 11 July 2012 at 04:14 PM